Gonna kick em.

April 5, 2008 | 7 comments

I declare to myself today: The next person to make fun of me for not having a job or to make a remark about my long education. Yes. This person.

I am kicking them in the junk.

Why is it Okay to make fun of me for not having a job just because the Mrs. has one, and the bills get paid? What? Oh? It’s not. Yeah. It’s rude at best. Mean on average. It’s not as if I like not having a job.

And the education: making fun of. “All that education and…” Can you mask your jealousy and/or insecurity a little thinner? Yes, I went to a lot of school. Yes, I have a lot of non-practical knowledge. Yes, I read a lot. Yes, I think about things a lot. You know, this might be more of a good thing than a bad thing. I would be a jerk to make fun of people who didn’t go to college. But I don’t have a chip on my shoulder wherein I have negative thoughts about people without stupid letters behind their names. So I would have to fake it to make it up. Maybe I have anti-higher-ed tendencies at times*, but those come from experience, not insecurity and/or jealousy.

Of course, there’s the defense when someone calls me “college boy” that they are just kidding. Joking. That I’m too sensitive and can’t take a joke. Like insensitive people’s required standard of sensitivity means anything to me.

Well, fine. My kick in your crotch is a joke, too. Don’t be so fucking sensitive.

[* I am told.]

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  1. Matthew on April 5, 2008 at 4:40 pm

    kick ‘em in the crotch for me too!

    I hate that kind of anti-intellectual bullshit.

    excellent post, man! my wife and I are always astounded by how little people read. nobody in our neighborhood reads anything of consequence. at best, they’ll read the latest Oprah selection. Some of them pride themselves on NOT reading, but they can talk till doomsday about the crap they watch on tv.

    keep on reading. keep on thinking. the television will not be broadcasted.

    and really, all these folks that are giving you a hard time are probably bitter from having a dehumanizing job for too long. shit, I know I am. but I’m not gonna give you a hard time.

  2. Matthew on April 6, 2008 at 8:20 am

    oops, I meant “the revolution will not be televised”

    well, that’s becoming a cliche too… maybe “the television will not be broadcasted” is better. has a slight Dada quality about it.

  3. Johnny on April 7, 2008 at 8:45 am

    I think the problem is that I take it from them. A kick in the crotch will fix that! LMAO

    I like “the television will not be broadcasted” better myself. It’s like a cool slogan for a TV shut-down day. :)

  4. ahniwa on April 7, 2008 at 3:26 pm

    I wanted to write a limerick here, making fun of you for loving gnomes and getting coffee at dunkin’ donuts, while glorifying your free-wheeling intellectual lifestyle and amazing powers of pontification …

    but the creative juices aren’t flowing.

    Oh god …

    I think graduate school broke my brain…. :(

  5. Johnny on April 7, 2008 at 9:47 pm

    Graduate school broke my brain,
    But I think I fixed it this summer
    When I walked into a swing.
    Now I can use it again,
    Which is no bummer
    Because I used to love that thing!
    But my gnome
    Likes to roam
    To his home away from home,
    Down the street, for donuts and coffee.
    I called him uncouth,
    But my bearded sleuth
    Uncovered the holiest truth:
    That no one in the world rocks as hard as me!
    :^)