Says Pope Benedict XVI about why he won’t let priests officially “get some.” But there is an open letter from a large group of Italian women who have had relationships with priests to the Pope, urging him to pull his head out from under his, er, robes and realize that:
1) Priests are already engaging in sexual and romantic relationships, and now we know that you know.
2) Everyone needs to be loved (and, I would add, to get some).
I mean, it’s not like the Church is going to budge any time soon. Had priests been allowed to marry in 1998 when I was getting not-so-gently urged into the seminary by my at-the-time pastor, I’d probably be a priest right now (for better for worse). So maybe I dodged a bullet? Then again, my wife and daughter would (I assume) still be the most important things in my life; so maybe not much would be different. I’d have wasted my 20s on a different kind of education, and it’s not like I don’t [still] enjoy Franciscan music.
I find this particular “scandal” not only less shocking (I can understand being attracted sexually to an adult woman or man, but not being attracted to young boys or girls) to my own sensibilities but also somehow more natural. Priests, who are people like you and I, get lonely and/or horny. Big surprise. Being human, they act contrary to Church teachings sometimes. Big surprise.
This could be a good thing. I’m not excusing the abuse of minors by priests, since power was certainly involved. But how many priests have you known who were a little….off, uptight, creepy, clingy, etc. who might have been better off, not only of they had another individual with whom to share their lives, but also, well, were getting some? I know a few lay people who have become less creepy when they started being in a sexual relationship, and I know a few people personally who were completely insufferable before getting laid on a regular basis (I’m not BSing you). Am I saying that everyone is better off when we all get whoopy regularly? Nah, but those among us who really need/want it are better off.
Of course, being the Catholic Church, if they were to relent and to allow priests get down like everyone else, they’d surely not extend this bit of humanity to homosexual priests. So these folks would have to still live in secret, like two priests I knew when I was younger did. It certainly wouldn’t fix everything if the Church merely allowed priests to marry, when gay priests can’t. And, of course, there’s the whole women-can’t-be-priests thing.
I don’t think I’ll live to see an egalitarian or realistic version of the priesthood in my time. But if I did, I’d likely see a healthier Church to boot.
